Thursday, August 14, 2008

Sometimes I Pickle Him

Photo by SiFu Renka

There are several books & magazines next to my bed for occasional night time reading. One of them is an anthology of food writings by the famous James Beard, an enormous icon in the food world. Wikipedia goes so far as to say that he "is recognized by many as the father of American gastronomy".
{I am a foodie, in case you haven't been reading this blog for long.} I picked up the book and read an essay the other night about pickles. Fascinating stuff. I love me a good pickle. Nowadays, the word "pickle" is pretty much synonymous with a pickled cucumber, but a pickle is any food, which has had the pickling process done to it, yes? {Hang in there, I'll be getting to a point later.} Mostly the food is put into a jar with spices & a vinegar solution. Vinegar. Yum. Useful for many things. Making pickles, salad dressings, and natural cleaning are some that come to mind.

Hold that thought.

Hubster & I had been having some fellowship these last couple of weeks {and I don't mean the nocturnal kind}. It's like something in our communication systems went haywire & the whole husband/wife processes were affected. It wasn't pretty. (I think the virus that infiltrated our communication system was called Stress 5.0). So during system debugging one discussion {where we were talking about our marriage}, I came to realize that I tend to use snappy little {sometimes snide} remarks to try and get my points across. Usually it happens when I think something is really important to me & hubs either doesn't "get it" or I feel he isn't taking me seriously.

Hold that thought too.

Ya know that saying "You'll catch more flies with honey than you will with vinegar." Whelp, sometimes I like to use the vinegar. I pour out those vinegary comments on him, hoping that'll get his attention.

Ok. Now take that saying & put them there two thoughts together.....


I pickle him. A husband pickle, folks.

I told him that, which served for a great & much needed laugh. And now that I'm more self-aware, I'll be trying my darndest to be that quiet, gentle spirit I know I can be. A crown to my husband, instead of a constant dripping. I'll be using that honey {and maybe a little butter too} to try and get my points across. Out with the pickles!

Anyone else out there making husband pickles? Let's pour the honey on our hubbies together. I'd love to hear from you. You're so close to the comment button already, ya might as well click it.


Beth said...

Brilliant! When I read the title of this post, I had to read it again because I didn't think I read it right. Now I get it. :-) Yep, I pickle my husband. Communication has been off here too. I have been trying. Hopefully after this month is over, it will be easier. Thanks for the reminder. I listened to a great lesson by Beth Moore yesterday on forgiveness...not of the huge offenses but the little tiny ones that build up and are usually by the ones closest to us. I realized that I hold on to a lot of the little things that Dan does until it builds up into something huge. I am usually left sitting there after it blows wondering why it was such a big deal to begin with. It's a lot easier to just pour out the vinegar then try to remember to open that honey jar. If I would just learn to practice forgiving the littlest things EVERY day, things would run a lot better around here. Anyway, I will stop thinking outloud now. Great post.

Peaceful Chaoz said...

Great Reminder, loved the way you wrote it, very clever! :0)

Saralyn said...

I live with a counselor, which makes for very interesting disagreements!

One thing that's been a great help in encouraging us to really think about what we say is an article by Paul Tripp called "Speaking Redemptively" available here.

Rebecca said...

Thanks for all the kind words. Glad my sometimes *interesting* mind can come up with thoughts that will benefit others as well. NO MORE PICKLES, GIRLS!!